Posted in Life

Everyone Has a Story: Empathy in Daily Life

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What’s something most people don’t understand?
View all responses

The list of things that people don’t understand is long. But for the purpose of this post, I’ll propose that most people don’t understand that everyone has a story. And chances are, you don’t know their story. Just as they don’t know yours.

What’s behind a person’s rude comment? Or impatient remark? What happened that morning to cause someone to cut ahead of you in line, lean on their car horn, look at you like they wanted to shove a knife in your gut, or suddenly push you out of the way.

I have no idea. I don’t know what the doctor just told them. I don’t know what just broke on their car. What’s leaking in their house? I don’t know what kind of trouble their child just got into. Maybe they just their job. Or a close friend.

I think most people don’t understand that we all have a story. Very few care about how my day went. Or what my struggles are. And to be honest, I don’t care about you and your problems either. It’s strange. We tend to be wrapped up in our own little world.

What if? What if I paused for a moment and listened? What if I simply asked, “What’s going on?” What if I cared?

I hate those questions. They are haunting and convicting. I know I should seek to understand. I too often forget. Be patient. Show some grace. It’s ok.

Everyone has a story. Find out what it is.

Posted in laughter, Life

What Makes You Laugh? Discover the Humor in Life

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Jenna Anderson on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What makes you laugh?
View all responses

This is such a great prompt. There are so many things that make me laugh. Here’s a short list:

  • My dogs look at me.
  • Nothing but junk in my mail box.
  • I wake up just before my alarm goes off in the morning.
  • An obvious scam text in my inbox.
  • My three year old neighbor shouting, “Hi!”
  • A student in a middle school class asking me about life before iPhones.
  • My dog suddenly leaping a foot into the air.
  • The Amazon, Fedex, and Ups man all arrive within five minutes of each other.
  • Most of life is humorous. From the way people dress at Walmart to double lines of cars winding around Chick-fil-A, I find myself chuckling at life.

Most of what happens, most of who I meet, and most of what I deal with in any given day makes me laugh.

It’t all about the way you look at life. You either laugh. Or weep.

Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

Productivity or Leisure: The Art of Doing Nothing

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Jeswin Thomas: https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-sitting-on-bench-under-tree-1280162/
Daily writing prompt
What do you wish you could do more every day?
View all responses

I wish I could do more “nothing” each day.

Even though I’ve been retired for a few years, I still set daily productivity goals. I still have a “To do,” “Doing”, and “Done” Kanban board on the wall. I feel compelled to redeem my time each day.

I consistently write, read, exercise, and practice music each day. I’ve always got a house project going on, do a little online teaching, love to cook and bake, and have dogs who need lots of exercise. Time for family, a few church activities, and learning new technology (3D printing and edible ink printing) and before you know it, my week is full.

I’m fascinated when I hear people talk about all the TV or movies they watch, or completely wasted days when they got nothing done. I’m not saying I want to live those kind of days. I not sure I would even last 24 hours trying to do nothing.

Maybe I should schedule a little nothing into my day as well. They say that simply sitting and doing nothing stimulates creativity, and I love the science of creativity. So if I could spend more time doing less, I would actually be accomplishing more?

There I go again.

Posted in church, Life, Ministry

How Technology Transformed My Ministry Experience

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Alex Kotliarskyi on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
How has technology changed your job?
View all responses

I’ve been retired for nearly three years now, but as a parish pastor, technology had a huge effect on how I did ministry in a local congregation.

When I started working in my first congregation in the mid-1980s, there were three ways to keep in touch with church members. You either sent a letter in the mail, called them on the phone, or knocked on their door.

By the time I retired in 2022, I had mastered many electronic ways to communicate with the church. While I still sent letters and made phone calls, I also sent email, text messages, messages through social media platforms, and broadcast an electronic newsletter each week. I never went to someone’s home without an appointment. People either weren’t home or just didn’t answer the door.

That being said, all that technology failed to silence the lament, “people don’t know what’s going on!” People just had more noise to ignore.

When I graduated from the seminary, I had a modest collection of books that I used for sermon and bible study preparation. That collection grew when I was at a church that gave me a generous annual book allowance. By the early 2000’s I found most of the information I needed on the internet, so I sold and gave away most of my printed books.

The Covid pandemic closed down in person worship services for our congregation. We were forced to learn how to broadcast worship from an empty church to members’ homes. I started with an iPhone propped up on some hymnals, moved up to my laptop balanced on a stack of bibles, until we invested in some digital camera technology. It was only a few weeks before we resumed worship in the sanctuary, but once we started, we just couldn’t stop broadcasting weekly services. As a result, people watched from all over the world. Some viewers financially supported the ministry, folks I would never meet.

When it was time to choose the next pastor, the leadership was not limited to a written resume. The selection committee interviewed every candidate via Zoom. Every prospect had a collection of online sermons to listen to. The process demanded a lot of time and energy.

Technology has been a blessing for the church since not every generation embraces new technology. But it’s also been a blessing. The church is here to communicate good news, and technology has helped her do that in so many ways.

Posted in Life

Younger

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Devin Avery on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What is one word that describes you?
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My answer to this very challenging prompt is “younger.”

I feel a lot younger than my birth certificate says I am. I feel twenty years younger than my age. I am more active than I was back then, and I am healthier than most of the people I know in my age group.

I also enjoy being around younger people. I love to teach middle school aged-students. I love playing with my grandchildren, all of whom are ten years old and younger. I love toys, too, and in some ways have just never grown up.

I like being around people who are younger than me. They keep me in touch with new ideas, music, and trends. I definitely handle new technology better than most people in my age demographic.

This was a hard prompt, but I’m satisfied with my answer. I considered “diplomatic,” “consistent,” and “creative.” I’m glad I settled on “younger.” I suppose one day I’ll have to grow up.

But not yet.

Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

Bring on the summer!

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What is your favorite type of weather?
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My short answer: summer.

Yep. I love summer. Even in Florida, where I’ve lived for twenty eight years. `

I love hot temperatures, humidity, waking up to 75 degrees in the morning, and a day of shorts and nothing else.

I love sweating from the moment I walk out the door in the morning. I love the boiling hot car seats that only cool off after two minutes after starting the car AC. I love walking the dogs in warm predawn weather, knowing that this is as cool as it will get all day.

I love sweating while working in the yard or a sweaty garage gym workout. I love feeling the sun beat down on me while walking the dogs at dawn or cutting the lawn in the evening.

I love having to smear sunblock all over my body every day. I love the rumblings of distant thunderstorms. I love the longer hours of daylight.

Everyone else escapes the hot summer months. I relish them!

Posted in Life

Algebra

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Laura Rivera on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
Who was your most influential teacher? Why?
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I was blessed to have so many outstanding teachers in elementary, junior high, and high school.

There is one that stands out. Mrs. Flaig was my eighth grade algebra teacher who helped me take my first step academically and mathematically.

Back then (1972), you were a smartie if you took eighth grade algebra. Mrs. Flaig had a reputation for being a very demanding teacher. No nonsense. Strict. Very strict.

The class was arranged in five rows of five wooden side-desk chairs. Each day, she would call a row and a column, and we would dutifully go to the front or side chalkboards to do an assigned problem. Those who’s rows or columns weren’t called had to check the work of those at the board. If either failed, we heard about it.

I rarely failed. I loved the problems and the solutions. I loved the equations, the variables, the graphs, and the solutions. Mrs. Flaig demanded much, recognized elegant solutions, and encouraged us to work hard.

Mrs. Flaig let me know in no uncertain terms that I was good at math. Her encouragement was all I needed to launch me into a world of mathematics. I was the best in the class in algebra. I loved ninth grade geometry. I was passionate about high school math. When I went to college I majored in mathematics. My brain was wired for math.

Mrs. Flaig guided me into an academic world of math and science that continued through college and my first job in computer programming. While I spent my career in pastoral ministry, I have always approached life through the eyes of a mathematician, with a constant eye toward patterns, series, equations, and variables.

Thank you, Mrs. Flaig.

Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

My choice: Cross-country cycling

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Lorenzo Rui on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane, train, bus, car, or bike?
View all responses

While I would love to take a long train ride across the country or take the bus, my first choice would be biking from the Pacific to the Atlantic ocean.

I know it takes about three months to cycle across America. I’ve followed the Instagrams of a few cross country riders, and I would love to bicycle those three thousand or so miles.

The physical challenge of such a ride appeals to me. I love being outdoors, laboring uphill and careening down the other side. I relish traveling light, with everything I need in just a few panniers front and back. I’m more than ready to spend the night in a small tent by the side of the road in the middle of nowhere.

It’s not an easy way to cross the country, but for me, it’s better than being cooped up in a car, train, or bus.

Posted in Life

Go for a walk, drink water, eat a snack, and pet your dog

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Wade Austin Ellis on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What strategies do you use to cope with negative feelings?
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I wonder what the writer of this prompt meant by “negative feelings?”

Is it disappointment because I didn’t perform well? Or sadness because I just lost a good friend? Am I afraid of an approaching storm? Or am I angry because someone dinged my car and drove away? Did I look in the mirror and cringe at how I looked? Did I look at you and cringe at how you looked?

We live in a world where we’re not supposed to hurt anyone’s feelings. We’re only supposed to say positive, affirming words. Negativity and pessimism are big no-nos.

Guess what? You’re going to feel anxiety, insecurity, fear, guilt, shame, and anger every day.

How do I deal with all that negativity?

Go for a walk.

That’s it. Get up and move. Walk away. Walk outside. Walk around. A simple change of location changes how you feel. Moving, breathing, heat or cold, singing birds, barking dogs, the sun, a breeze, or a star in the sky refocuses your thoughts. Suddenly negative things aren’t foremost in your mind anymore.

Also, drink some water.

Feeling negative? Chances are you need to hydrate. Most of us don’t drink enough water. Your body and mind might just be saying, “You’re thirsty.”

In a similar light, eat a snack. It’s OK to snack. It will probably make you feel better.

Still not there? Pet your dog. You’ll enjoy it, he or she will enjoy it, and life will be good again. Don’t have a dog? Get one. A wagging tail effectively counters negative feelings.

That’s all I’ve got. Four simple and effective actions to counter negativity in your life.