Tag: furniture

Posted in trash

The pink sofa

Posted on by William Douthwaite

It’s not uncommon to see furniture out on trash collection day. It’s unusual to see pink furniture on the curb.

This is a kid-sized sofa. At two-and-a-half feet high and maybe sixty inches long, I doubt it’s big enough for our Great Dane to nap in. (I should have gotten a quick picture of her trying it out for size.)

I am sure it matched the decor of little girl’s pink bedroom. And for her it was perfect for sitting and watching a video, jumping up and down, and reading a book to a collection of stuffed animals.

I didn’t check any tags, but it’s a safe bet that this was made in China. I wonder how many were made. I wonder if those working on the line making these wondered, “What crazy American is going to buy a pink sofa?” Some Rooms To God assistant manager had to put this out on the display floor. wonder if that manager chuckled when a family came in and said, “This is perfect. We’ll take it!” I’ll bet the trash collection guys were amused when they picked it up, too.

Colors are personal. We love some and others nauseate us. As I walk around the neighborhood, I can’t help but wonder out loud why anyone would paint the outside of their home (or dye their hair) a bright orange or mustard yellow. Or buy a car the color of puked-up green pea soup. But I know that those folks picked those colors deliberately, and, at least for now, think it looks nice.

Maybe someone actually picked up this pink sofa and took it home before the trash truck got there. Perhaps it will be loved a second time.

Posted in dogs, Life

No instructions? No problem!

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Daniël Maas on Unsplash

I recently helped my daughter, husband, and two boys move into their brand new home. After moving all the heavy stuff in from a trailer, there were a few things to put together, like the boys’ beds.

With the help of a cousin, I assembled bed number one, the bigger of the two, without any trouble. Bed number two was more of a challenge. A few months ago, their golden retriever puppy had chewed up the corner of the box. No parts of the bed were damaged. But he managed to obliterate the instructions.

Since I’ve assembled more than my share of IKEA furniture, I felt confident this would be a breeze. Come on, it’s a just a twin bed with headboard and footboard. An uncle and I opened up the box and got out all the parts. Hmm. Many of the parts looked the same. The legs had lots of holes that had to match up with other holes. It wasn’t obvious which pieces were for the headboard and which were for the footboard.

Thankfully, enough of the box was intact and my partner could look up the model name and number. Once he brought up a picture of the bed from a shopping site, we knew what we had to do. All the screws were the same size, so we didn’t have to guess which ones went where. When we were done, the bed looked just like the picture.

I’ve had plenty of puppies chew up plenty of things in my home. My Labrador retriever Gabriel had a fondness for the heels of shoes and my roommate’s candles. Our chocolate Lab Rachel chewed up the legs of a borrowed rocking chair. We currently find teeth marks in the grandkids’ plastic toys. After a few ripped up rolls of toilet paper, we now keep the bathroom doors closed. The same pup who ate the bed frame instructions stole a couple of uncooked meatballs off the kitchen counter.

A friend of mine lost the cover of his bible to an enthusiastic pup. Just about everyone I know who wears hearing aids has lost one to a curious canine. It’s all part of the fun of being a dog owner.

Speaking of Gabriel (he’s the baseline against which we measure all our dogs), he once tore into a Christmas box my mom sent to us in Connecticut. The box arrived by UPS, and we knew it contained presents for the family. Gabe tore into the box and found the gift for him, a large, carefully wrapped rawhide bone. We came home and found him eagerly chewing on it. He didn’t bother, chew, or rip open anything else in the box. He just knew there was a gift for him in the box and he knew which one it was.

Posted in DIY

Those wood stickers aren’t going to fool anyone

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I had no problem assembling a small writing desk for what used to be our front bedroom. In fact, I challenged myself to put it together without looking at the instructions. I’ve built enough pieces from IKEA and Wayfair to know what to expect when I open the box.

As expected I found a packet of screws, cams, and wooden dowels inside the box. Fifteen minutes later, I was finished except for one last step. The manufacturer included several sheets of stickers that someone thought looked like wood to cover up the metal screws visible on the back of the desk.

The stickers didn’t match the color of the desk. The grain didn’t match the laminate covering the desk surfaces. I stuck them on anyway. Maybe from a distance they wouldn’t look too bad.

From a distance my wife said, “That’s ugly.” Those stickers won’t fool anyone. And they weren’t that sticky, either, already starting to peel away.

Forget that. On to plan B. I’ll paint them black to match the black trim around the top and legs of the desk. I brushed some black acrylic craft paint over the bare metal. Perfect.

I wonder who came up with the idea of fake wood stickers? There are plenty for sale online. How many people use them? How many people actually like them? I’ll bet the workers in China chuckle as they pack these in the boxes destined for American homes.

Posted in heaven

Furniture in heaven?

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Grant Durr on Unsplash

Today I was reading Psalm 99 and came across verse 5

Exalt the Lord our God;
    worship at his footstool!

It’s not unusual for my mind to wander to some interesting places in the predawn hours of the day. That verse first made me exclaim, “God has an ottoman?” Actually, that sounds really cool. Creation is finished. God’s ready to put his feet up and rest. Why not? Then I wondered, “Does God have any other furniture? Jesus spoke of his father’s house and its many rooms. Is it furnished? If so, how?

I know it’s not important, but just off the top of my head I recall some heavenly furniture mentioned in scripture: a throne, a banquet table, lampstands (floor lamps?). That might be it. And that’s OK with me.

Update: A friend of mine told me her parents always said not to be afraid of thunder. It was just God rearranging his furniture!