Tag: time

Posted in retirement, time

Four years? Already?

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

I’ve been retired for exactly four years. My last Sunday worship service was July 17, 2022. It’s time to reflect on this chapter in my life.

First, I am not bored. I have never been bored. For all who wondered, “What will you do when you retire?” or “How do you pass the time?” let me assure you that my life is full. My life is full of the same people and experiences, as well as lots of new ones.

I had lots of extra-vocational pursuits during my career as a pastor. I practiced music (guitar and trumpet), wrote (blog posts and devotions), exercised (everything from running to weight-lifting to Crossfit), gardened, and cooked while I worked. Retirement meant more time for those things. I learned bluegrass guitar, continued to write, re-created much of the gardens and landscaping around my home, learned how to make sourdough bread and sugar cookies, and walked many neighborhood miles with a giant dog (hello Willow, the Great Dane).

My family continued to grow in size (from eight to ten grandchildren) and ability (baseball, dance, soccer, basketball, flag football, reading, and crafting). I had time to watch, cheer, and help them create. I love the privilege of grandparenting.

Church and worship were a challenge. I didn’t move away, so I was told to separate from my church for a year. Let the new pastor settle in. Don’t get in the way.

Okay. Problem is, churches of my denomination are few and far between in these parts. One just to the north. Felt mechanical and sanitary. One to the south of us. Lots of struggles.

I tried an Evangelical Free church. Good preaching. Conservative theology. Friendly people. Great fellowship with men. Before I knew it, I was engaged with a men’s bible class, a couples small group, and teaching middle school youth. I also gained a better understanding of my own faith as well as the fervent faith of other Christians.

Turmoil at my retired-from congregation led me to worship at the church just to the south of us. They were seeking a pastor, aligned with all of my beliefs, and needed some of what I had to offer. I felt much more at home here as I plugged into their mission and ministry.

Along the way, my wife encouraged me to try out an online Bible Study Fellowship group. This group of men, weekly meeting via Zoom studied the bible in-depth and developed surprisingly good online relationships. After a couple of years, I became a group leader. I’ve learned so much from the group I lead, and from the training required to be a leader.

A couple of years into retirement, my wife and I started a small business making custom iced sugar cookies. She was the artistic arm of the business while I helped with the bookkeeping, making cookie cutters, and baking. I learned a lot about accounting, 3D printing, and edible ink printing. It was challenging but not profitable, so I also learned about closing a business.

Most recently, I’ve been asked to fill in for vacationing pastors. I’ve enjoyed the Sunday morning preaching and teaching experience without much of the daily work that happens in-between weekends. I remember how much I appreciated preachers who covered for me during vacations, and I am happy to provide that for others.

Since I’ve retired, I’ve got two new dogs. One is small: a White West Highland Terrier we adopted from an older couple. One is giant: a Great Dane we picked up from a breeder west of here. Dogs bring much joy to my life.

I’ve met so many people since retirement. Some in person, some online. All have been a blessing, and have helped me become the newest, best version of me.

I think that’s a lot of what retirement has been. I’ve transitioned from a life measured by what I do to who I am. From activity to being. That’s been the best part.

I no longer say I’m busy. Instead my life is full. Full of people, places, and experiences. It’s so much better than I ever imagined it would be.

To be honest, I don’t miss it. As much as I loved pastoral ministry, preaching, and teaching, I do not miss the weekly pressure of sermon preparation, endless non-essential meetings, and impossible expectations that accompany that profession. Retirement came at just the right time for me. Burnt out? Perhaps. Time to explore a new chapter.

Without a doubt-waite. Lol.

Posted in Food

Is it done yet?

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Marcelo Leal on Unsplash

When I put my sourdough bread in the oven to bake, I set the timer on the microwave. After I reheated some coffee in the microwave, I realized I turned off the bread timer. Fortunately I was able to guess how much time was left, and neither burnt the bread nor took it out too soon.

Sometimes I have Alexa set a timer on my Amazon Echo. Other times I set a timer in my phone, which is usually in my pocket. I’m toying with the idea of buying a separate magnetic timer I could attach to the oven or microwave.

How did people time their cooking and baking before smart devices and digital clocks. Of course we used to have a timer you twisted to the desired countdown time. But what about before that?

My research uncovered some fascinating techniques used to know when food was fully cooked.

Baking involved watching for browning to occur. It might be when beans or potatoes are soft. Sometimes it’s the smell that tips you off that the food is ready. I’ve learned to press on a steak to determine how done the meat is on the grill.

Older time-keeping methods included measuring the amount a candle melted, the movement of the sun against the wall, sand pouring through an hourglass filled with sand, and a dripping water clock.

With some food, like a pot of soup or stew, it really didn’t matter if you cooked it an extra half-hour or so.

With experience, cooks developed a sense for the passage of time, and knew when time was up. I would love to develop that skill!

Posted in Life

I’m lost

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What activities do you lose yourself in?
View all responses

Lose myself in? Meaning: I lose track of time, and suddenly an hour (or more) has passed, and I didn’t realize it.

That’s a tough one. I am super aware of time. I have a sense of how many minutes have passed. Or how many seconds are left until the timer goes off. I often wake up just before the alarm goes off.

I think I learned that from running. I paced myself by with the rhythm of my breath. My breathing helped me pace myself. I developed a good sense of quarter, half, and mile pacing by the music running through my head. I’ve never worn headphones to listen to music when I run or walk. Instead, I hear songs from high school band half time shows in my head. Or pieces I’ve learned for auditions and performances. Or a song from the radio I heard yesterday.

So, I guess I can easily lose myself in melodies from the past, in my mind, or those earworms that refuse to go to sleep.

Ok, so I lose myself when I run. But I don’t run that much any more. (My feet hurt too much.)

So what do I lose myself in?

Painting rocks with grandkids. Long walks with the dogs (as long as I turn off my fitness tracker). When I’m watching a really good movie. (When I don’t check my watch to see how much longer).


Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

It’s about time

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Olga Nayda on Unsplash

A “through the bible” devotion from Psalm 90.

Kids grow up in the blink of an eye. Waiting an hour to see the doctor seems to take forever. Time is a curious thing. It may zip by or it may drag.

I would imagine that time dragged for Moses in the wilderness. Psalm 90 is attributed to him. Forty years out in the middle of nowhere. He tries to keep it in perspective.

For a thousand years in your sight
    are but as yesterday when it is past,
    or as a watch in the night. (Psalm 90:4)

It’s easy for God. From the perspective of eternity, a thousand years seems like yesterday. A single shift at work.

Our seventy or eighty years seems like a long time on the front end. But “they are soon gone,” and at the end of life, you wonder where the time went.

So teach us to number our days
    that we may get a heart of wisdom. (Psalm 90:12)

It’s a learning curve to keep things in perspective. Our lives on earth are finite. Our lives with the Lord will last forever. Those two realities rattle around in our minds. Mortality and eternity.

That awareness gives us wisdom. The wisdom to enjoy this moment. The wisdom to remember life up to this point. The wisdom to keep eternity in mind. The one “who was, who is, and who is to come” enables us to live in all three dimensions without skipping a beat.

The watch on my wrist dictates much of my day. But it doesn’t define my life. The Lord does.

Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

Right on time

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Andrik Langfield on Unsplash

A “through the bible” devotion from Psalm 70.

Make haste, O God, to deliver me!
    O Lord, make haste to help me! (Psalm 70:1)

It’s interesting to meditate on David’s words. His prayer (or song) begins, “Hurry up, God!” As if God were dawdling. Or late. Or behind schedule. Or got distracted and lost track of time.

From our point of view, a situation may seem urgent. From God’s point of view? Maybe not so much. He knows what’s going on. He knows what you’re anxious about. He knows how things will turn out. He knows how other people will be affected. He knows what you need to experience and what you need to learn.

Most importantly, he’s never late. He’s always right on time. Now from out point of view, with our eye on the clock and a day full of deadlines, it might feel lke he didn’t get the memo.

But in hindsight, I often discover that God was already present and active in situations when, like David, I implored the Lord to hurry it up. Sometimes, it becomes clear that God had already taken care of something even before I asked him about it. I guess that means he showed up early.

There are people in this world who are habitually late. Others always arrive early. Still others are on time to the second. God isn’t bound by time though. He’s there, never in a rush, never trying to catch up, and never too busy to pay attention to your urgent requests.

Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

The day the sun stood still

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Patrick on Unsplash

A “through the bible” devotion from Joshua 10.

Ever have a day that seemed to go on forever?

Maybe it was a travel day, when you had delays, cancelled flights, and endless lines. It took you a whole day (or more) to get home.

Some of the days when hurricanes were coming through seemed to go on and on. The power was out and the storm was in no hurry to move along. The night seems even longer as the wind howls and you wonder what just hit the roof.

Or you’re sitting in the hospital waiting. You’re waiting for the surgeon to come out and tell you how the procedure went. Or you’re waiting for the baby to be born. Or you’re in the emergency room, waiting for lab results. The time seems to pass so slowly.

When I was growing up, the one-hour drive to my grandmother’s house on the other side of Philadelphia seemed so long. The 1-1/2 hour drive to the Jersey shore seemed to take a day and a half.

Our perception of time doesn’t actually change a time period. Only God can do that. He only does it a couple of times in scripture. One of those times is when Joshua fights an alliance of kings who have attacked Gibeon. In the account, Joshua asks the Lord to slow down time so Israel can avenge their enemies. God does just that. In fact,

“The sun stood still, and the moon stopped, until the nation avenged themselves of their enemies…The sun stopped in the middle of the sky and did not hurry to go down for about a whole day” (Joshua 10:13).

The Day the Sun Stood Still by Poul Anderson, Gordon Dickson, and Robert Silverberg is a collection of three science fiction novellas that explore that day. How would the world react if that actually happened? What would be the effect on religious, political, and personal life?

I read this book a long time ago. Having remembered the title, I need to go back and read this again! When I do, I promise to update this post.

There are moments when we wish time would speed up. Like when you’re hungry and it’t still hours till supper. There are others times when we wish we could slow time down and enjoy the moment a little longer. Like those times when our children grow up so quickly.

Are you someone who has plenty of time? Or not enough time? Ironically, we’ve all got the same amount of time, twenty-four hours, every day.

Posted in Life, time

Right on time: we missed all the excitement

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Stan: https://www.pexels.com/photo/car-side-mirror-showing-heavy-traffic-191842/

As I came down the highway exit ramp, I saw the red flashing lights off to my left. I saw the police car first, then a car with a smashed in driver’s side, and then a pickup truck up against a tree. I shifted lanes to pass by, noticing more lit-up police cars approaching from both directions. Within a quarter mile, two fire engines, three more police cars and an EMT flew past us. A response like that means a fatality. Just a few minutes later, the radio reported all lanes closed in both directions.

We missed it by a minute.

If we had left the house one minute earlier, we might have been the ones involved in the crash. If we had left the house one minute later, we would have been stuck in stand-still traffic.

We didn’t experience either. We left at the right time, drove at the right speed, and missed all the excitement. Coincidence? Providence? Who knows. Grateful? Absolutely.

In some cultures, time isn’t relevant. On mission trips to Haiti and Kenya, morning departure time for the clinic was when the trucks arrived. Lunchtime? When the food showed up. What time should we be ready for supper? When we no longer heard the sound of chickens from the kitchen, there was still time for a nap before washing up.

The inner city church where I interned started the worship when it looked like most of the congregation was present.

In my grandchildren’s world, it’s always snack time. It doesn’t matter if only been minutes since lunch or just a few moments before supper, they’re trolling for snacks. With the last bite of a snack in one hand, they are already pleading for the next.

In other settings, time rules. I remember family members missing a baptism because they showed up ten minutes late for worship. Leave those spritz cookies in the oven one extra minute and the bottoms are burnt. If I don’t check in online exactly twenty-four hours before my flight, I’ll end up sitting in a different row than my wife.

Early? Late? On time? In retirement, it doesn’t seem to matter as much. Except when I miss all the excitement at the scene of a crash.

Posted in Life

Retired?

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by James Hose Jr on Unsplash

The other day my wife said, “It really bugs you when people ask you that question.” She was right. It’s a tough and uncomfortable question to answer; “So what are you doing now?” Many want to know.

This question was asked before my planned retirement date and and comes fast and furious a year later.

Sometimes it’s a friendly conversation starter. “So what have you been doing?”

Other times I feel like I need to justify my decision to retire. “What do you do all day?”

“How do you pass the time?” That one has notes of depression and meaninglessness.

A year into retirement, I feel guilty saying it’s been great. I haven’t been bored. I don’t miss my work (more on that later). And I’ve been plenty busy. Here’s a little recap of my first year into retirement.

  • I have been writing. In addition to this blog, I wrote a set of Advent devotion in 2022, and then Lent devotions for the following spring. I thought I could monetize these, but only netted $18. Having gotten little feedback, I may not write more in the future.
  • I’ve made four trips to Dallas to visit my son and his family, plus a week long fall color trip to Maggie Valley, NC.
  • I redid all the landscaping in my front yard, painted the inside of the garage, rebuilt some of the backyard kids play fort, converted the front bedroom from a guest room to a music room/study.
  • My wife and I watch some of the Florida grandchildren at least once a week.
  • My church involvement has included a biweekly small group, and a weekly men’s ministry, as well as weekly worship. I also did a year of Zoom Bible Study Fellowship with men from around the world.
  • I’ve read three books a month, often from the library. Most are detective/crime novels.
  • I get to the gym three times a week (free membership) and easily get in 10,000 steps a day walking the dog(s), doing yard work, or other stuff around the house.
  • I’ve been learning bluegrass guitar. I’m not quite ready for a jam, but I’m getting better at my pentatonic scales.
  • I’ve been sorting through thousands of digital photos, deleting duplicates, sorting, and labeling the keeper. I’ve also been paging through hundreds of journals, constructing a time line of our lives. I’d forgotten places we’ve been and things we’ve done.
  • My winter/spring garden yielded lots of cherry tomatoes and way too many jalapeño peppers.
  • I’ve attended a whole bunch of the grandchildrens’ soccer, basketball, t-ball, baseball, and flag football games, plus a dance recital.

I certainly don’t feel like I’m “passing the time” until I cash in my chips. The fact that I don’t miss my work tells me two things. First, it was the right time to retire. Second, I was burnt out.

A number of pastors at the church where I’m now worshiping get a sixty day sabbatical every five years. What a difference that would have made. I rarely got more than two weeks off in a row, ever. Some of that is my fault. I should know better than to keep going on empty.

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoyed pastoral ministry. But I enjoy being out of that role, too. I enjoy just being me.

Posted in Stories

I’m done; he’s just getting started

Posted on by William Douthwaite
Photo by Sam Moghadam Khamseh on Unsplash

When I arrived at the gym on Saturday, I got there just as a man about my age was fumbling for his key fob to get in. I said, “I got it,” and swiped mine for the both of us.

He then signed in on the same clipboard as I do, a Silver and Fit membership that I get free through my insurance. I said, “Oh, so you’re the other old guy.” He didn’t answer.

I get right to work at the gym. My workouts always start with squats, so I find a rack and start doing warmup reps with an empty bar and then increasing weights until I get to my working weight. It only takes me a few minutes and I’m ready to begin my five sets of five reps.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watched him slowly and deliberately get ready to work out. He sat on a bench and unpacked his duffle, laying out his gear. He took off his sandals, put on socks, and pulled his knee braces up. After he put on his shoes he hung two weight belts over a bar on another squat rack. He certainly was well-equipped.

By this time, I’d finished my squats and moved on to overhead press.

In between sets I watched him set up his phone on tripod and aim it carefully at the squat rack where he would be working. He sat for a few moments, writing in a notebook. He found a few plates and loaded up the bar. Finally, he started doing a few warmup repetitions.

Having finished my presses, I moved on to deadlift, which for me is only a few sets. I was done by the time he began his workout.

I know it’s good to be prepared, safe, and methodical. Take your time, and make sure your form is correct. Everyone has their own style. I just don’t have that much time to be in the gym. I get in and out as quickly as possible.

Some people say they don’t have time to work out. Guess why?