Posted in Life

Life Before the Internet: A Personal Reflection

Photo by Benjamin Dada on Unsplash

This is my response to the WordPress daily writing prompt, “Do you remember life before the internet?”

A quick internet search informs me that the public gained access to the internet 1993. When I think about all the ways I use the internet every day, I recall life before my life was connected to everyone and everything.

I did my banking in person. I walked into a building and engaged with a teller who recorded my deposits and withdrawals by hand. I received bills in the mail, and paid them by mailing a check. Now I do my banking and pay my bills online. I may physically go into a bank once a year to get some specific cash I need to a trip or a garage sale.

When a teacher assigned a research paper, I headed for the library. We were not permitted to simply use the bound volumes of an encyclopedia for information. We used a card catalog and the help of a librarian to find resources for the paper. We took notes by hand on index cards and arranged them in preparation for a first draft, written by hand or typed out on a loud, clunky, manual typewriter. Now the internet grants me instant access to virtually every resource in digital libraries all over the world.

While at college, I wrote and mailed letters to my parents to let them know how I was doing and how much money I needed. A week later, a letter from my mom or dad would arrive with news from home, and hopefully, a check. Now, I instantly communicate with all of my family and friends via email and multiple chat platforms.

I used to go to the store! I went to clothing stores, sporting goods stores, and book stores to buy what I needed. Now, I pick something out unseen online and it arrives at my front door in a day.

A paperboy tossed a morning and an evening newspaper to our front door. We learned about current world events and local happenings by paging through these daily publications and black-and-white television news programs. Now, headlines are pushed to my phone before I wake up in the morning.

The only music we listened to was from AM radio stations and my parents’ collection of vinyl records. In high school, I bought a few 33’s of my own. But in college, my friends introduced me to so many other artists and songs, all on LP’s. Stereo systems included tuners, amplifiers, speakers, turntables and cassette decks. I currently own zero CDs. All my music is streamed via the internet.

We went to the movies to see a movie. I remember laying in the back of our station wagon at a drive-in theater watching The Sound of Music and Bye Bye Birdie. I have a few DVD of favorite movies, but for the most part, I stream all movies on the internet.

Four times a year, I brought home a handwritten report card from my teacher. As a parent, I logged on to a portal to find out how my children were doing in school.

In my profession as a parish pastor, I preached to a room full of people. Until Covid. I quickly learned how to preach to a video camera which streamed my message to the congregation watching at home. I led and and attended many virtual zoom meetings from the comfort of my home, an impossible task without the internet.

I used to call a travel agent to book a flight to wherever. Now I plan my travel online.

If I need to learn how to do anything, I watch a video online. Before the internet, I called my dad. “How do you…?” He always knew.

Before the internet, I went to a venue and bought tickets at the gate. At a baseball stadium or a concert venue, tickets were available. Now, I get my tickets online, with a parking pass as well.

If I wanted someone or anyone to read my writing, I don’t even know what I would do. Now, I simply post something like this on my blog. Done.

Posted in Life

5 Simple Joys: Morning Sparks Happiness

Photo by Emma Simpson on Unsplash
Daily writing prompt
What are 5 everyday things that bring you happiness?

Waking up.

    I’m a morning person. An early bird. No two ways about it, I love waking up in the morning. Somehow my body knows the time, and I almost always wake up at 5:55 am. Depending on the season, it might be dark, or the sky may be light. But that’s when I like to wake up, and I like to wake up. Rarely do I sleep in.

    Waking up and walking the dogs.

    This has long been a part of my morning routine. After feeding the pups, I put on their leashes and we’re out the door. We walk around the block or around many blocks. It’s quiet. The air is still. I can hear the sounds of traffic and trash trucks off in the distance. I think it’s the best time of the day.

    Waking up and walking the dogs as dawn colors appear on the horizon.

    As we walk, the sky slowly turns from night to day. As it does, many hues of orange paint the sky, especially if there are clouds. It’s magnificent. How can there be so many different kinds of orange? I’m impressed by the Creator’s work up above.

    Waking up, walking the dogs, watching the brightening sky, and hearing the birds singing.

    When we leave the house, it’s quiet. But not for long. One bird starts singing. Another responds. Pretty soon, my ears are filled with birdsong. I whistle back, participating in an antiphonal chorus. They probably aren’t fooled, but I like to think we are singing together.

    Waking up, walking the dogs, watching the brightening sky, hearing the birds, as ideas show up in my head.

    This is when I think of some of my best, most creative ideas for writing and storytelling, The rhythm of my steps and the tempo of my breathing stimulate my right brain. I speak my ideas into my phone, messages I’ll see later. I don’t want to forget.

    Everything about the morning brings me happiness, from my first step out of bed until I get back from the walk. For me, it is a magical part of the day, regardless of the weather, the day’s agenda, or how I slept that night.

    Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

    Fifteen more years

    Photo by Carl Tronders on Unsplash

    A “through the bible” devotion from 2 Kings 20.

    What would you do if you knew when you would die?

    When King Hezekiah gets sick, the prophet Isaiah tells him to get his affairs in order. It’s terminal. He’s going to die.

    After Hezekiah prays and weeps, Isaiah comes back and says, “Good news. God is going to give you fifteen more years to live!” (2 Kings 20:6). As a sign to Hezekiah, God makes the sun’s shadow move backwards. Yes, Hezekiah, it’s for real.

    How would you live if you knew you had fifteen more years ahead of you? I think that much time makes the question a little harder to answer. It’s one thing when the doctor says, “Three to six months,” or perhaps another year. Fifteen years is a long time.

    Would it take you fifteen years to get through your bucket list? Or would you coast until you got to the last year to tie up loose ends?

    Would you still try to take care of yourself? Or would you cancel the gym membership you don’t use and eat whatever you want? For a while – exactly fifteen years – you’re immortal.

    At what point would you begin to sweat? When would you start to worry about your demise? What would you think about in year fifteen? After all, you don’t know how you’ll die, just when.

    I believe it’s better not to know. The psalmist prays, “Teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12). Embrace your mortality, accept the uncertainty of life and death, and make the most of today.

    Posted in Through the Bible Devotions

    It’s not just about the rules

    Photo by Dave Photoz on Unsplash

    A “through the bible” devotion from Deuteronomy 6.

    So are you a rule-keeper, a rule-bender, or a rule-breaker? Maybe you don’t want to be any of those. Rule-keepers aren’t much fun, are they? Rule-breakers are nothing but trouble. Rule-benders aren’t reliable. None of those categories sounds very good.

    Great news. You aren’t defined by rules. Read what Moses said to Israel:

    “Hear, Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one! And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. And you shall repeat them diligently to your sons and speak of them when you sit in your house, when you walk on the road, when you lie down, and when you get up. You shall also tie them as a sign to your hand, and they shall be as frontlets on your forehead. You shall also write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates” (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).

    It’s all about who God is and who they are. God’s word, filled with commands, statues, instructions, and rules was meant to be more than a list of things to do. Instead, God’s people were to infuse their desires (heart), speech (repeat them), actions (your hand), thoughts (forehead), and home life (doorposts and gates) with these words so they could live.

    Take a board game or a card game for example. There is much more to the game than reading, understanding, and following the rules. There’s the game itself. There is luck (the roll of the dice or the hand dealt to you). There is strategy. And there are other people who bring laughter, cries of despair, promises of revenge, and shouts of victory.

    You don’t play a game so you can follow rules. The rules enable us to enjoy the game. In the same way, we’re not here just for the rules. God’s word gives us life and shows us how to get the most out of it.

    Posted in retirement

    Suddenly, life is full

    Photo by Kari Shea on Unsplash

    We were both standing at the kitchen island, working on our latest baking projects. My wife was cutting out sugar cookies to be baked and decorated for a granddaughter’s preschool graduation and nascent cottage food business. I was giving my sourdough a final stretch in preparation for an overnight in the fridge.

    I chuckled and asked, “We had no idea we’d be doing this six months ago, did we?”

    I’m coming up on two years of retirement and my wife has been easing into hers over the past six months. I was never able to come up with a really good answer for the question, “So what are you going to do?” Or, “What’s retirement going to look like for you?” She didn’t many good answers, either.

    I think that’s because you just don’t know. You don’t know what opportunities, challenges, or people will show up until they do. In addition to baking and decorating cookies, we’re raising a Great Dane puppy, working on a wellness newsletter, and considering leading a small group. I’m going to lead an online Bible Study Fellowship group in the fall and teach a middle school Sunday School class once a month. None of these things were on the table even six months ago.

    Yesterday, the pastor was preaching on Genesis 12. As that chapter unfolds, God says to Abram, “Go,” and “Abram went.” Talk about a bold step of faith. God’s command prompts all sorts of questions, but the only answer is, “I will show you.”

    • “Go.” “Where?” “I will show you.”
    • “I will make of you a great nation.” “How?” “I will show you.”
    • “I will bless you and make your name great.” “How are you going to do that?” “I will show you.”
    • “I will bless those who bless you…in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.” “What do you mean by that?” “I will show you.”

    Over the next twenty-five years and eleven chapters of scripture, God does show Abram (Abraham) how he is able to do more than all we ask or imagine. In a lot of ways, the Lord has done the same thing for us. We’ve met great people, traveled to new places, and gotten involved in new ministries.

    A lot of other people seemed to be concerned about our retirement life. I wasn’t. I kind of figured God would find a way to fill it up.

    Posted in driving

    Keep your distance

    If you look carefully, you’ll see that the light is red. There are two cars stopped ahead of me. And then there is this car just to my right, twenty-five feet from the intersection. As we wait, she doesn’t inch forward until the light turns to green. “Uh-oh,” I think to myself. I’ll bet she’s going to try to merge in my lane when we start moving.

    But she doesn’t. I leave room, but she makes no move. I watch carefully, but she keeps going straight, even after I turn left at another light about a thousand feet ahead.

    So, as I often do, I wonder, “What is going on here?”

    • Maybe she’s a super cautious driver. She wants to keep a safe distance from the intersection in case someone is crossing the street. Don’t you hate it when you have to walk around a car sticking it’s nose into the crosswalk?
    • She doesn’t want to tailgate. We all hate tailgaters, don’t we? Oh, wait, there’s no one ahead of her.
    • The obvious: she’s on the phone. Maybe she’s been on the phone, and still doesn’t notice that the people ahead of her drove away when the light turned green. Oblivious, she’s waiting through another cycle.
    • Did her car stall out? She could have been calling AAA at that moment. Cars break down in the worst possible situations, right?
    • Maybe she knows the people in the SUV ahead of me and was talking to them. The light is red, so she can’t go anywhere anyway.
    • She could be hallucinating. Maybe she sees two cars in front of her that no one else can see. Hmm.
    • Invisible cars ahead of her? The car’s automatic braking sensors knows there there. Stopped that car on a dime.
    • I’ve eaten in the car before. I remember driving a stick shift on the Garden State Parkway in New Jersey, tossing a token for the toll, and eating a cup of blueberry yogurt on my way to a class a Rutgers. Maybe she doesn’t multitask well, and a snack distracted her.
    • Was she lost? Was she trying to get Google Maps to give her directions?
    • One more. It’s an malfunctioning autonomous car. There ‘s a bug in the software, so there she sits.

    I never know what I’m going to see on the road.

    Posted in dying, Life

    One more time: visiting a friend in hospice

    Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

    I went to visit some old friends the other day. They are living in a beautiful assisted living facility just a few miles from my home. He’s been getting some physical therapy and is getting around really well. She is receiving hospice care, and her family told me she only had a day or two left to live.

    Hoping that she would be lucid, I went to visit her right after I spoke with her daughter. Though confined to a bed, she was awake, comfortable, conversant, witty, and all smiles. She had every reason to be. She had all four of her daughters there with her. When I walked in, they were singing one of her favorite hymns, “For All the Saints.” Her two sons had been there the week before. I was thankful I had this chance to sit and talk with her for a while.

    That was five days ago. Death isn’t an exact science. It’s inevitable, but it’s not predicable. We’ll just have to extend grace to the hospice folks when they answer the question, “How long does she have?” She’s not conscious anymore, but she’s comfortable and listening to all the conversations going on around her.

    Whenever I’ve asked people about the best way to die, I often get the answer, “In my sleep.” On the one hand, that sounds like a great way to go. But on the other hand, you might miss out on all those precious moments you get to spend with friends and family. When death comes unexpectedly or accidentally, many wish they could have seen or talked to them one more time. A few days in hospice provides a lot of “one more times.”

    My dad was in and out of hospice care the last few years of his life. My brother, sister, and I had a lot of “one more times” with him as he flirted with death but kept bouncing back. I think he enjoyed the attention and company when it looked like his time was up.

    I like going to visit someone who’s in hospice care. When the finish line is in sight, the conversations are meaningful, the desire for life is powerful, and every moment is precious.

    Posted in Life

    I guess we only need one car

    It’s been a while since we only had one car. Just about forty years to be exact. My wife and I each brought a car into the marriage and we’ve always had at least two. Until today.

    With both of us working and three kids to raise, we drove off in directions more often than not. As a nurse and a pastor, my wife and I spent a lot of time driving to hospitals all over northeast Florida. When our three children attended three different schools, they needed rides to dance classes, band rehearsals, sports practices, and friends’ houses. When they learned to drive, we parked three cars in the driveway.

    All of that has changed in retirement. Without daily trips to church, hospitals, nursing homes, and members’ homes, I drive a lot less than I used to. Most of the time, one car sits idly in the driveway. So why do we have two? Good question. Could we get by with just one car?

    About half the homes in our neighborhood have more than two cars parked in the driveway. Few can squeeze a car into their junk-filled garage. My neighbor has two Corvettes in the garage, and another two cars in the driveway for him and his wife. Around the corner, another neighbor has four cars parked in a circular driveway, two of which haven’t budged in over two years. I believe single-car households are the exception rather than the rule.

    Here is our strategy for owning just one car:

    • Keep and frequently check Google calendar to avoid conflicting appointments.
    • Work towards going to the grocery store once a week, rather than every day. The trick will be better lists and better planning. How often have you had to start a new shopping list as soon as you started putting away the groceries you just brought home from the store?
    • If we put our minds to it, we can bunch our errands together into one outing rather than several.
    • When I need something at the store or I want to go to the library, I can always ride my bike. Many of the places I drive are just a couple of miles away. In a pinch, there’s always Uber or Lyft. Or a neighbor.

    Cutting car expenses in half is a welcome improvement in our budget. Gas, insurance, maintenance, and payments can consume large portions of our income. Or not, if we don’t have as many vehicles.

    So we’ve got one car parked in the driveway. We’re going to give it a shot.

    Posted in Life

    Another child to hold

    Photo by Jimmy Conover on Unsplash

    This afternoon I got to meet number nine – my ninth grandchild – in person. We’ve got a baseball team now. It’s always a special moment to hold a newborn, but even more so when it’s family.

    We need these moments to say, “Hello!” in a world where we too often speak a graveside “Goodbye” to those we’ve loved for so long. A birth interrupts the news of another shooting, disease, storm, or war to remind us it’s not over yet. Life happens, too.

    Fast asleep in her swaddle, I didn’t get to hear her voice, look into her eyes, tickle her toes, or let her tiny fingers wrap around mine. I’m looking forward to those moments.

    This small person, completely dependent upon the care of her parents, will get whatever she wants, day or night, at least in the beginning. She will exert control over her family’s schedule, priorities, and activities. She is the main event, the headliner, Miss Popularity, and the keynote speaker all rolled into one. At least for now.

    And we love it. We love these moments. And we love her. We hardly know her but she has captured our hearts. We wonder, “Where have you been?” She reminds us of how precious life is. Not just hers, but ours. And “those” people, too. (You know who I’m talking about.)

    Her dad said she started yelling right away, announcing, “I’m here!” We’re glad you are. Welcome, little one.