Category: Life

Posted in Life

Working with wood

Posted on by William Douthwaite

Photo by Chandler Cruttenden on Unsplash

Four years ago I built a wooden play fort and swing set in my backyard for the grandchildren. Since then, some of the boards dried out and rotted, even though I treated them with some sealer. So it was time to replace some of the boards.

I was able to find some decent pressure-treated wood at the big box store and got to work. As I measured, cut, drilled, and screwed the new boards in place, I realized how much I enjoy working with wood. It is so satisfying to slice through a plank with my miter saw, blow away the sawdust, and feel that nice, smooth cut. As I drill each pilot hole and sink each deck screw, I love watching the boards pull tightly together.

As I work, I remember what my dad taught me about working with wood. My grandfather was a carpenter. I believe he mostly framed houses, but he may have done some finish work, too. He would not let my dad work that trade, though. My dad had to go to college and become an engineer. But my dad learned the craft from his father and passed it along to his sons.

When we cleaned out dad’s house before we sold it, we found my grandfather’s homemade toolbox and tools. It weighed a ton. It contained saws, hammers, chisels, planes, an auger and bits, and a few nail sets. All human-powered. I use a lot of power tools: a miter saw, cordless drill and driver, jig saw, nailer, router, and sander. But I can still work with the hand tools, too, thanks to dad.

Dad taught me how to mark a board with a carrot shape rather than just a line. That way there’s no question about where to make the cut.

Dad taught me how to start a cut with a saw, up against the side of a knuckle. Yeah, you get a few cuts that way, but slicing through a piece of wood with a nice sharp crosscut saw feels amazing.

Dad taught me how to drill holes by hand. I love watching the curls of wood come up from the hole as the auger sinks deeper and deeper into the board. After doing a few of those I knew why Dad had such big forearms.

Dad taught me how to start and drive nails straight. And how to straighten them out when they bent. And how to not spilt the wood with your nails.

I might have enjoyed being a carpenter. I never got to do wood shop in high school. I was too busy taking college prep courses. Instead, I learned from dad, from putting up shelves and fixing things around the house, and building play equipment for the grandkids.

I wonder how different my life would have been had I pursued a trade.

Posted in Life

The slowest way

Posted on by William Douthwaite

Photo by Luca Ambrosi on Unsplash

All I had to do was mail a small package, returning an unwanted product. I usually use the self-serve kiosks at the post office. Ah, one is open. I touch the screen and get this message, “Unable to do anything right now.” Fine. I’ll wait. But the guy at the other kiosk is standing there, with a package on the scale, trying to figure out what to do next.

OK, I’ll go wait in line. Three people ahead of me. Sweet. I can do this. Within minutes, a hand goes up and it’s my turn. I step up to the window, hand over my package, and say, “Send it the slowest way.” I get a chuckle from the post office worker as well as the people around me.

In the past, I might ask for the cheapest or quickest way to mail something. This time, I didn’t care about the arrival time. Put it on the bottom of the pile, and load it onto your slowest truck, the one likely to break down on the way. Whatever.

How often do I ask for the slowest something? Rarely. I want the shortest line with the most experienced cashier at the grocery store. I drive up to the window for fast food. I like my GPS to take me on the fastest route possible. I can read a book much faster with the Kindle app on my phone than holding a printed copy.

When is it better to slow down a little? To take a slow rather than a brisk walk. Prepare food in a slow cooker rather than the microwave. Read a book slowly and thoughtfully. Wait in the longer line and talk to someone.

What else can I do in the slowest way?

Posted in Life, Travel

$199? Are you kidding?

Posted on by William Douthwaite

We were pretty excited when we saw short lines for bag drop at the Spirit Airlines counter at Orlando International Airport. Just before a hand went up to summon us to an open scale, I heard a man exclaim, “A hundred and ninety-nine dollars? Are you kidding me?” (Yes, he used more colorful language.) He hadn’t paid for checked bags in advance and both suitcases were over the forty pound limit. That’s not a happy way to start your journey. Clearly, he was a rookie Spirit traveler.

On our way home from Dallas, we found a few seats behind the gate desk. I overheard a man exclaim, “Ninety-nine dollars? You gotta be (add your colorful adjective here) kidding.” His carry-on bag exceeded the 18″x14″x8″ dimensions for a “personal item,” so he was going to have to pay. His wife added, “We never had a problem before.” I subtly wandered over just to see how big those carry on bags were. His backpack was about double the allowed fatness. Hers was an open, overstuffed tote bag. When he pulled out a wad of cash, the agent said, “I can only take a credit card.” His face got a little redder. His wife handed over a credit card and said, “Fine. We don’t want to be those people.”

“$99. Are you ^%$&^* kidding?”

As we waited to board the plane, I watched gate agents tell passenger after passenger to put their unpaid carry-on in the “personal item” size box. They know what’s not going to fit. It’s entertaining to watch people try to stuff huge bags into that little space. Guess what? You’re going to pay.

The gate agents who had to deal with all of that were well trained. They had awesome people skills. Good thing, because they had to deal with a lot of challenging people.

One of my new hobbies is travel hacking, figuring out how to make the most of cheap fares. I am amazed at how roomy a 17″x13″x7″ backpack can be. My wife and I both had one of those and one checked bag. Sweet.

So here’s some of what I’ve learned about traveling cheaply:

  • If your travel days are flexible, you’ll save money. Some days are cheaper than others. That’s just the way it is.
  • If you must check or carry on a large bag on Spirit or Frontier, pay for it when you book your flight. You’ll get the lowest price.
  • Buy a backpack or roller bag within the personal item guidelines. It will hold so much more than you think. Ladies, pack an empty purse inside your personal item and load it when you arrive.
  • Lay out everything you want to pack. Put half of it back in the closet and dresser. You’ll be fine. You can wear some clothes two times.
  • Buy your toiletries when you get to your destination. Our Airbnb had soap, shampoo, conditioner, and toothpaste in the bathroom.
  • Wear your jacket and hat. Put stuff in your pockets. Once you’re on the plane, stash them away. No need to take up luggage space.

This time, our flights were the cheapest part of our last trip to Dallas to see my son and his family. Next up: reign in the cost of a rental car, which is getting ridiculous.

Posted in Life

The Lenten Devotion scam

Posted on by William Douthwaite

In 2018, I began writing Lent devotions to accompany my midweek sermons in the six weeks leading up to Easter. I’ve sent them out as daily emails, I’ve posted them on my blog, and this year I sent out the whole collection on Fat Tuesday, the day before Ash Wednesday, the traditional church season of Lent.

In response to my email, received a phone message: “This doesn’t sound like you. I think you may have been hacked.” And an email, wondering, “Did you send out devotions? I think you may have been hacked.”

The only thing I did differently this year was to open the door to Venmo donations for my devotions. I spent about one hour one each devotion. After editing and publishing, I figured I spent about sixty hours on this most recent project, “One of those days.” When I sent out the collection of devotions, I simply added, “You can support future devotions with a donation” and a Venmo address. No pressure. No paywall. No obligation. Not even an ask.

Danger, Will Robinson! Scam alert! Red flag! I commend all who wondered if this was legit. Yes, be on guard against any and all kinds of scams. But I also want to remind you of what looks like a scam and what doesn’t.

First, the scam won’t come from someone you know. Look at the email, not just the name. Look familiar? Then it’s legit. A long string of letters and numbers? No bueno.

Next, a scam will ask you for money and give you nothing in return. My email gave you devotions for free and asked for nothing in return. Obviously not a scam.

Finally, think for a moment. Who sends out Lent devotions to get into your personal information? Is that even a thing? Have you fallen for that scam in the past? Who else out there is giving you something for free?

You can all relax. If you want the devotions, email me: padrebill57@gmail.com. I’ll send it to you for free. Want to donate? Venmo something to @padrebill57.

Wow, just think of how much money I could have walked off with if I had thought of the Lent Devotion scam years ago!

Posted in Life

Sleeping with the horses

Posted on by William Douthwaite

While visiting our Rowlett, TX family, we stayed in the loft of a horse barn that we discovered on Airbnb.

So some travelers might think, “You stayed in a horse barn?” Kind of. The loft had been remodeled into a very nice 600 square foot efficiency, more comfortable and equipped than some of the whole houses we had rented before. When I told three-year-old granddaughter Josie, “We’re sleeping in a horse barn,” she said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea. The horses will chew you up!”

We were in no danger of bring chewed up by the two horses who lived in the barn beneath us, Proton and King. They were all about the fruits and veggies we brought. As soon as we pulled up into the small parking area, they ambled over. We thought they were just being friendly. They wanted to see what kind of snacks we brought for them. Every time we left for the day or came home at night, they came over for carrots and apples. If we had none, they quickly went back to whatever they were doing, which was mostly foraging around the yard for food.

The neighboring corral was home to some Shetland ponies. As soon as they saw us feeding the big horses, they came over to the fence, knicker it a soft, “Don’t forget about us.” We didn’t, and they were more friendly when all the produce had been eaten.

Late at night, if I woke up and rolled over, I listened to the night sounds. The heater fan and the refrigerator robbed the night of its silence. Plus, I heard some other sounds. Water dripping? No. Wind outside? Sometimes. Then I realized the other sounds were the horses in their stalls right beneath us. They were snoring or eating or moving around or whatever horses do at night.

We’ve stayed in eight short term rentals in Rowlett and Garland. Some were newly remodeled and very nicely decorated. Others were spartan. One had four bedrooms with a TV in each. This one was a single room. When we come, we really don’t spend a lot of time in the rental other than to sleep.

The horses really make the loft stand out. I know they are fair weather friends, more interested in treats than in me. But they always welcome us home after a day of negotiating Dallas metro traffic to go anywhere or do anything.

Posted in Food, Life

A slow food restaurant

Posted on by William Douthwaite

As we walked into the restaurant, I noticed this sign at the host station. This was a small breakfast/lunch place with both indoor and outdoor seating, lots of diners enjoying a meal or a cup of coffee brought by the waiters. No drive through window. No tablet ordering kiosks. Nothing resembling a fast food restaurant.

So I couldn’t help but wonder, “What have you experienced here that would make you order and post such a sign?”

I didn’t get the chance to ask anyone that question, but I can just imagine some of the comments and behaviors they have had to deal with. Patience is a virtue, but it is not a common virtue. People want want they want when they want it, and generally, they want it right now.

There may be another dozen tables in the restaurant, but some want you to get to work on their order immediately. Ten minutes has become too long to wait for food?

It could be that people just don’t cook that much at home. They forget how long it takes to prepare a meal. The longest they ever have to wait is two minutes for something to come out of the microwave.

I wonder if the customers who need to read that sign are the ones who see those words? Does a sign like that silence the impatient and demanding clientele? Do words like that really change anyone’s behavior? Do folks read that and react, “OK. I guess I’ll go somewhere else”?

If you don’t have time to wait for a table, don’t have time to sit and have something to drink and look over the menu, don’t have time to wait for the cook to prepare your food, and have to eat and run, then why did you come here at all?

There is something so nice about not having to rush, not having to cook, and not having to clean up. You can focus on the people you’re with, enjoy the place and sometimes the view, and be off the clock for a while.

Posted in Life

Don’t ding our car

Posted on by William Douthwaite

We had a few hours to kill before our Airbnb was ready in Rowlett, TX, so we went to one of our favorite local downtown places, Bankhead Brewery. All of the street parking was filled, so I pulled into the gravel lot out back.

As I pulled into a spot, a couple was getting out of an Infinity SUV next to us. I was still getting used to the rental van, so I lingered a minute to make sure all the doors locked. The other couple walked away towards the restaurant, but kept looking back at us. A better word would be “glared.” Especially the woman. She gave us the evil eye as if to say, “If you ding our car, buddy, we’re going at it!”

I double-checked my parking and we were fine. I was right in the middle of my spot. My wife could open her door all the way without touching their not-that-new vehicle. Still, we got several more glares as we followed them to the restaurant.

After we got inside and sat down, I went back out to get my wife’s reading glasses. As stepped away, she said, “You might want to move the van further away.” I agreed and repositioned the van two more feet away from theirs before I rummaged through a backpack for the readers.

After lunch, we walked back towards the van, and saw they moved the SUV out front to the street parking far way from this reckless driver’s parking lot antics. I asked, “Did they finish before us?” My wife answered, “No, I saw them sitting by the front window. They weren’t eating, just drinking.” It wouldn’t be hard to spend the afternoon day drinking at Bankhead. They have 16 of their own on tap every day.

So maybe, just maybe, they were worried that they might ding our van when they went to leave the brewery. I should try and explain everything in the best possible way, right?

I’ll try.

Posted in grandparenting, Life

The joy of rock painting

Posted on by William Douthwaite

My four-year-old grandson and I have a new craft for those days he spends with us: rock painting.

We got the idea when we purchased a cheap rock painting kit at Hobby Lobby. The kit came with a bunch of rocks, but hardly any paint, and one lousy brush. There is no way we could paint rocks to look like the ones on the box. But we wanted to.

So I got to work. We had a nice assortment of craft paint brushes here at home. We had some paint mixing trays, too. I ordered a rainbow selection of craft acrylic paints on Amazon. I went to Hobby Lobby and found 40% off bags of rocks. I bought two bags (about a dozen rocks each) for $4. Now we’re ready to do this right.

I spread out the plastic craft tablecloth on the dining room table and we got to work. We used every single color to paint every single rock. We used a different brush for each color, and when they all had paint on them, I rinsed them out and we got back to work. He did mostly solid colors. I painted a few rocks al one color, and when they dried, added a sea creature. That’s what we originally wanted to do. I painted a sea turtle, a jellyfish, an angel fish, a flamingo, and a dolphin.

The next week, his older brother got involved and we painted rainbows and Roblox characters (Barry the Prison Guard and Papa Pizza). We didn’t have to buy more rocks. You can paint them over and over again.

So what is so fascinating and satisfying about painting rocks? For a while it was a very popular medium. Our public library has a rock garden out front where you can leave or paint rocks. A rock is a small enough canvas that it doesn’t take long to finish a project. It dries quickly and you can just stick it in your pocket to take home. For a preschooler, it’s all about quantity, not quality. Rocks are cheap and you and put a whole lot of paint on a whole bunch of rocks in a short amount of time.

We store up all our rocks in used egg cartons. They are ready to go the next time we are inspired to paint!

Posted in Life

Bringing wisdom

Posted on by William Douthwaite

Photo by TheStandingDesk on Unsplash

The new person in my online Bible Study Fellowship (BSF) group a couple of weeks ago was Mophath, who lived in Nairobi, Kenya. It’s cool to study the scriptures each week with men from all over the world. Some members of my small group live on the east and west coasts of the US, others are in the midwest states of Illinois and Iowa, and four live in Africa. Earlier in the year, one guy lived in Hawaii.

Our leader asked Mophath to introduce himself to the group and tell us a little about himself. He’s twenty-two years old, is studying at the University of Nairobi, and learned about BSF from a friend. When he checked out our group, he saw many “who could be my grandfathers.” Yes, our group leans a little toward the retired side of life. We’ve got a few young guys, and Mophath will lower our average age a few more years. “But,” he added, “I am thankful for the wisdom you all bring.”

His comment revealed a respect for those who are older that my culture doesn’t necessarily display. Maybe I am more aware of that as I wade a little deeper into senior citizenship. I get senior discounts now, so I guess that’s where I am. I don’t feel that old, but I get a weekly reminder when I see myself on Zoom. Mophath’s comment made me think about my respect – or lack of respect – for those older than me. Or even those my age.

Feelings of disrespect bubble up when some folks can’t seem to handle technology. Some struggle with self-checkout lanes, smart phone updates, TV and cable remotes, and resetting the clock in the car for Daylight Savings Time. But wait a minute. Don’t we all struggle with those things?

I get a little agitated when I have to wait for someone who’s moving a bit slower than me, or takes a little more time to express an idea. That is, until I remember that I make more mistakes when I rush through something. I also say some really stupid things if I don’t think before I speak. Just relax.

It’s bothersome when those who are older have such little tolerance for the appearance, language, and habits of a younger generation. I know, it’s always been this way. The “generation gap” is nothing new. I feel out of place among those who fully embrace tattoos, piercings, brightly dyed hair, K-pop, and choosing their own pronouns. Guess what? I’ve advanced to an older generation.

I haven’t yet felt too much disrespect from a younger generation. I think the way to dodge that is to show an interest in them and listen to their story. Perhaps that’s wisdom I’ve discovered over the years. I should give God credit, too. He said that you reap what you sow. Show respect, and you’ll receive respect.