Posted in church, Ministry

For some, this is church (part 2)

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Photo by Jakub Kapusnak on Unsplash

For me, the “church” has always been church. But there are other gatherings that function as “church” for them and their families.

It was quite a while ago, but I vividly remember a conversation with some visitors to our church. They only came the one time and wouldn’t be back because their children were involved in a youth hockey league. But they were OK with that, because in their words, “Hockey teaches our kids the same things as church: teamwork, loyalty, sacrifice and hard work.” For them, the hockey experience was church.

In another conversation, an on and off attender explained that they got more support, inspiration and fellowship from their lodge than from the church. Church for them had been filled with conflict, controversy, and contradiction. Their lodge encounter was everything that they thought the church should be. For them, that was church.

Yet a third person found church in a group that met at a coffee shop each week. There they could talk openly about their struggles, and the others would listen. There was no condemnation, only affirmation. The group was loyal, dependable and supportive. Since they found everything they needed right there over a cup of coffee, who needs church. Their coffee-shop group was church to them.

Mark Zuckerberg claims that Facebook can provide the support and purpose that people seek through online groups and communities. His mission is to bring people — 1 billion people — together in this way.

I know that the church is about more than just a support group. But why do some churches seem unable to provide the connection, support and therapy that many desire and find elsewhere?

Maybe Satan doesn’t care if you invest your time and energy into a team, a lodge or coffee. But he’ll do his best to make your church seem like the last place you’ll find what you are looking for.

 

Posted in Grace, Ministry

How big is my parish?

yeshi-kangrang-337082I’m often asked, “How big is your church?” That’s a harder question to answer than you realize. Are you asking how many members we have? Or how many come to worship on a Sunday morning? Should we include those who are only in town part of the year? Do we include those who have moved away but still affiliate with us.

Jesus, the Good Shepherd, said, “I have other sheep that are not of this fold” (John 10:16). Those words hold true for those of us who are ungdershepherds, too. My ministry includes

  • Some I visit in nursing homes or hospital who have never actually come to our church (see “This is my pastor”).
  • Some who used to attend, but don’t come for worship any more.
  • Funerals and weddings for those who are not a part of our congregation.
  • Unchurched spouses, children and parents of members.
  • Families who have attended our Vacation Bible School or Preschool.
  • A few neighbors around my home.
  • Seasonal worshipers, whose main residence is elsewhere.
  • Friends of my children.
  • Friends of students in our youth group.
  • Acquaintances I only see occasionally, at parties or special events.

A whole bevy of people who call me, “Pastor,” for one reason or another. The walls that previously delimited the church were replaced with chain link fences that you could look through, but now even those seem to have come down.

So what has really changed: the church or me? I’ll have to give that more thought.

Posted in Grace, Ministry

For some, this is church.

IMG_8027Right after our Vacation Bible School a couple of months ago, I had a revelation. Sorry, nothing supernatural, just some clarity about people and church and people who go to church and people who don’t hardly ever go to church.

Here it is: “church” means different things to different people. Let me tell you what I mean.

I had an amazingly easy time recruiting volunteers for Vacation Bible School this year. In fact, I had people coming to me asking to help out. I actually had more help than I needed, but I found something for everyone to do. In fact, I believe we actually had more leaders than children come this year. This is church

They came faithfully every night, they took their jobs seriously, they worked hard and did a great job and even stayed after to help clean up. The thing is, a decent number of my volunteers don’t even come to church very much if at all. A few times a year at best.

Then it hit me. Vacation Bible School is church to some people! Continue reading “For some, this is church.”

Posted in Ministry

Are we enabling a consumer mentality in the church?

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From time to time I have lamented the consumer mentality with which many people approach the church. This is the attitude that a spiritual service or product can be obtained from a pastor or church without having to actually connect with that church or its ministry. Families drop by the church for a baptism, confirmation, wedding or funeral, but do not engage beyond that event or milestone. I use the supermarket analogy, where savvy shoppers stop by for spiritual supplies as needed. If there is a sale or special at another church, they will not hesitate to switch.

Today I read a short but insightful article by Bobby Gruenewald in the May/June 2013 issue of Outreach Magazine about “Pastoring the Community.” He says that “The church has become a consumer good — something people shop for and evaluate based on what they and their family get out of it.” But then he adds this true and convicting observation: “In well-intentioned efforts to attract and reach people, churches start viewing people as customers. We wonder what we can teach that will resonate with them. What programs can we offer to keep them coming back?” (p. 26)

I believe it’s an accurate observation. We enable their behavior. And there’s a price to pay for that. We bring out that attitude as our sinful nature makes it all about us rather than about God or our neighbor.

It is very challenging to maintain an outward focus. We so quickly and easily slip into the “how can we grow” mode of thinking rather than a “how can we serve” approach. We want what we do to benefit us in some way, whether it’s increased membership, participation or contribution. But is that what following Christ looks like? Is that where the Gospel leads us?

How do we shift from serving ourselves to really serving those outside the church, those who need hope, light and grace?

Posted in Grace, Life, Ministry, Rant

It’s harder to come back than I thought

Ed Stetzer has written an interesting article for Q ‘How Christian Consumers Ruin Pastors and Cheat the Mission of God’. I have often struggled with those folks who simply come to church for a product or service, not unlike taking your car to an auto mechanic or hiring a contractor to work on your home. It could be a baptism, wedding, funeral,counseling or some other type of inspirational entertainment. We pastors step in it all the time, willingly providing what we think people are looking for, fearful of what will happen if we do not continually attract and retain an influx of new people at church. How effective and healthy can ministry be if that’s the model?

In retrospect, it was so good to get away to Haiti for nine days. Even though it was an intense, tiring week, the only expectation was that I be a pastor. “Do justice…love kindness…walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8). Help people, show compassion, pray and preach the word. No meetings, few demands, and countless opportunities to proclaim the gospel in words and actions.

You get spoiled real quick. It’s freeing to not be hounded by time and schedules. So when you get back to the real world, it’s hard — real hard — to take seriously some of the things you used to spend time and energy on. Like meetings that accomplish little if anything. Complaints and concerns about our facilities. Shopping and travel plans for Christmas. A whole bunch of people who live in tents in Haiti, including many of our friends, are now in the path of a hurricane in the Caribbean. Suddenly, it’s real hard to focus on that other stuff. And maybe that’s a good thing.

Posted in Life, Ministry

Breath in, breath out

In his book Between Sundays, Dr. Richard C. Halverson writes, “The real work of the church is what is done between Sundays when the church is scattered all over the metropolitan area where it is located — in homes, in schools, in offices, on construction jobs, in market places.”

What do you think of that statement? It has some interesting implications. For example, it means that volunteering at your child’s school is just as important as volunteering to teach Sunday School at your church. Knowing the names of and praying for the people who live on your block is just as important as knowing and praying with the people who worship with you. What you learn at school and getting good grades there is just as important as what you learn at church (and even though we’re all about grace, we’re trying to do our best there, too).

Dr. Andy Bartelt, a professor at Concordia Seminary, speaking at a recent church worker’s conference used the image of breathing in and breathing out to describe church work. Gathering together on Sunday is like inhaling, and scattering to go back to our homes and lives and world is like exhaling. We must do both to live. When we’re scattered, God calls us together by His word. When we’re gathered, he prepares us and send us out.

Breath in — breath out. I like that image. What do you think?

Posted in Life

Would anyone miss us?

I left you hanging yesterday with the question, “What is an appropriate tool for measuring the effectiveness of a church’s ministry?” I feel the need to investigate that question and maybe come up with some answers. It is so hard to step away from numerical growth because that’s most visible and easily measurable. And bigger is better, right? Growth equals success. If you’re growing, you must be doing something right. We’ll model you. If you’re not growing, you must be dying.

The other day, my friend Jay wondered, “Where is the church” when spring break alcohol arrests quadrupled this year at Panama City beach? You can read his thoughts here. What kind of influence does or can the church have in the lives of young adults? How can we help them pursue a different kind of spring break that benefits both them and others? Isn’t there something the church can do? Is anything different in your community or community because you’re church is around? That maybe one way to measure effectiveness.

You can ask that question another way: if your church folded tomorrow, would anyone in the community miss it? That’s a painful question, because there are some days when you’d have to answer, “nope.”

Posted in Life, Ministry

An old friend

A few weeks ago I received an invitation to the 50th anniversary of Luther Memorial in Tinton Falls, NJ, the church I attended when was living in New Jersey and working for Bell Labs before I went to the seminary. It’s been twenty-eight years since I’ve been there, so I am flattered that they remembered me and sent me an invitation. Unfortunately, the celebration is on Palm Sunday, and I am working. But I took a few minutes to write with my my greetings and record a few memories for them.

Just out of college, working my first job, living in my first apartment, I decided to search out a church in Monmouth County, NJ. The first one I tried didn’t even notice I was there. The second one, Lutheran Memorial, embraced me as one of their own from the moment I stepped in the door. The first Sunday there, someone took me to lunch. The next week, they got me involved with the choir and playing trumpet. The third week they invited me to help teach the high school class. And from there, grew to love ministry much more than my profession. The love of that congregation propelled me towards the pastoral ministry in a big way. And for that I will always fondly remember and thank God for my time with them.

Posted in Ministry, Rant

Why doesn’t our church do that?

“Why doesn’t our church do that?” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that question. Another church, near or far, does something newsworthy, and the first question is, “Why aren’t we doing that?” It’s a good question, and I’ve thought about a few responses, some better than others.

When I first hear a question like that, I’m tempted to think, “Great, something else I have to do.” That is not at all true. It is just an opportunity, and more specifically, an opportunity for the person who brought it up to get involved. We should assume that if someone notices a need for ministry, then God is moving them to get involved in that ministry. So a better response is, “That’s a great idea. What’s your plan? Who are you going to get involved?”

But as I think about it further, I believe we also need to stop thinking about competing with other churches. If a congregation is doing a ministry, then we are too, if we truly believe that the “church” is just more than our local congregation. In effect, if another church is doing it, then our church is doing it, too, and the question becomes, “How can we can join them in their efforts?” We do not need to reinvent or clone every ministry, but can enhance what God is already doing. Maybe that’s part of the message he’s sending when we wonder, “Why aren’t we doing that?”