By Gods grace we are spending a long weekend near Harrisonburg, VA at the time of peak fall color. It’s hard to predict, so I don’t take credit, but just thank God for the beauty of autumn all around me for these next few days.
As I sit and enjoy the reds, yellows and oranges, and watch as gentle breezes suddenly shake free leaves that lazily fall like huge snowflakes, I realize how fleeting this moment is. In a week, these leaves will be gone. Okay, they won’t be gone. They will cover the ground, but without their brilliant color. The trees will be bare, mere sticks coming up from the ground. The view will be hues of gray, brown, and black.
Isn’t that the way of so much beauty? Beautiful people surrender to aging, beautiful night skies disappear at dawn, a beautiful sunrise gives way to the day and the colorful fall leaves too soon fall.
So we savor the moment. We do not despair it’s passing, for we know it was never meant to last. We await beauty’s next appearance, for we know she’s on her way.
Last night was fifth commandment night in confirmation class. “You shall not murder.” So we ran through the gamut of the best known killing sins, from murder to abortion to euthanasia to suicide to manslaughter.
I guess my lesson gets pretty gruesome as I describe each, because several of the students bemoaned, “Do we have to talk about this?” “That’s horrible!” “Why are we even discussing this?” Which I find very interesting, because they are all gamers to some extent. They spend time in virtual worlds shooting people, crashing cars, blowing up zombies, and waging war. But when you actually sit down to talk about real killing, they get uncomfortable.
Perhaps that’s a good thing. We spend a lot of time in a virtual world of sorts, where shootings, explosions, fires, storms and epidemics fill our news feeds. Most of them don’t directly touch our lives, so it doesn’t bother us too much. It’s not till you sit down and talk about real killing — on your street, in your family, at the school — that we start to pay attention.
Maybe we need to talk about that more. We need to talk about what it really means to take care of someone in hospice, or with an unexpected pregnancy, or who has killed in war or law enforcement. Perhaps then we would understand the depth of this commandment and the importance of life to our Creator. We would better understand what we think are the “lesser” killing sins: anger, hate, bullying and hurtful language. We would better grasp what it means to take care of our lives, exercising, eating right, and getting enough. And maybe – just maybe – we would be moved to take care of others’ lives.
But if the class was uncomfortable talking about death, just wait. The sixth commandment is up next. Time to talk about sex!
Photo by Connor Ellsworth on UnsplashBlaap. Blaap. Blaap.
Alright, alright. I reach around and finally shut off the alarm. Are you kidding? It’s still dark out. Really dark. What was I thinking? No — today we are doing it. We are getting up and going to church. Period. No debate. Let’s go.
Sheesh. Why does the Keurig work so slowly on Sunday mornings? We are getting a new one as soon as the Black Friday sales come out. As the fog lifts from my brain, I realize that we’ve got lots of time to get ready. 8:15 worship? No problem.
O. My. God. The shower feels so good. I could just stand here in the hot water for hours. Just a month ago the water was chilly, ’cause we had no power for a week. Yes, God, thank you for answering my prayer and restoring my power!
Let’s go. Everyone up! Breakfast? Don’t worry about it. They have cookies and muffins and donuts there. Just find something clean. You know how the pastor is. He’s not looking to see how well the kids are dressed. No, it doesn’t matter if your socks match. Who’s going to see them? We sit in the back anyway. Yes, you can bring your octopus. And your ferret. And a waffle.
It’s only ten minutes to church. The ride is quiet. Not too many cars on the road. D*** we are early. There aren’t any other cars in the parking lot. That’s strange. We’re never the first ones here.
No way. The sign on the door says “One service at 11 am”. Are you kidding me? Why didn’t anyone tell me?
Shoot. That’s right. He did send a text. And an email. Wasn’t there something on Facebook too? Son of a b****.
Oh well. Dunkin Donuts is open. What kind of donuts do you guys want?
Today we did something a little different for Reformation worship. Rather than two services with different styles, we had one service utilizing the musical talents from both at our usual later time. The praise team (guitar, bass, piano, vocals) led the first half of the service, and the organ, choir and bells stepped in after the sermon.
As usual, I was a bit reluctant to wade into the logistics of a blended service. I know that some of our worshipers attend one service or the other because of musical style. Others choose to come at a certain time. Pouring everyone into the same bucket means that we’ll be missing some families that day. It also means that some people won’t get to sit in their usual seat for worship, always a source of irritation for Lutherans.
As expected, attendance was down about 20%. We were missing a good number of families who usually come to the early worship service. Five cars pulled into the parking lot for the early service, somehow not knowing that this was the one service week. Despite three weeks of verbal announcements, emails, and text messages, they didn’t get the memo.
On the flip side, the church felt like it was full, we enjoyed the musical talents of all our musicians, and we were once again blessed with God’s gifts of grace. Not all, but most of the babies, toddlers and children were there, which is such a dynamic part of worship. They remind us that unless we become like little children, we’ll miss out on God’s kingdom.
It’s different for me. You see, I go to both worship services every week. I’m OK with worshiping early and later in the morning. I enjoy both styles of worship. I know everyone in the congregation. Each week I get to spend the whole morning there with our families, children, youth and seniors.
Unfortunately, in the back of my mind, I am always aware of the reality that if someone doesn’t like the worship experience, they might not be back. I know it’s not supposed to be that way, but it is a reality in our world and in the church. It certainly doesn’t honor the work of the Holy Spirit in believer’s hearts. It also doesn’t recognize the faith of those who gather not just to receive God’s grace, but to take it with them back out into the world.
Will we do it again? Probably. For some special occasion. Maybe for my last service. Ha! That got your attention, didn’t it?
It was the spring of 1982, a significant year for me. I had quit my job at Bell Labs in New Jersey and moved to Austin, TX to begin a new job with a friend of mine who was helping to start a new company. They were going to make deep oil well probes to check the pressure far below the surface. I would be the programmer, working alongside some engineers who would design the hardware. Coding is a hot topic now. Back then I was doing assembly language programming on 8086 Intel chips.
Within two months, the company dissolved and I found another job with Bausch and Lomb, a division of Houston Instrument, just before the advent of CAD/CAM. My division programmed these massive tabletop printers for architectural drawings. It was really cool to see the pens whip around a huge sheet of paper to render a drawing.
Anyway, it was during this time that I realized I enjoyed everything I was doing with the church more than anything I ever did with my job. The pastor who confirmed me told me I should become a pastor, but I never gave that any more thought. Till now, when a vicar at my Texas church said the same thing nine years later. Hmm. Is that even a possibility? After all, I didn’t study any theology as an undergraduate. Could I really do that? My vicar and pastor assured me I could. In fact, lots of seminary students were second career.
So I applied. I sent off my application to Concordia Theological Seminary in Ft. Wayne, IN, where there were more second career guys than system guys. “System” guys went to a Concordia undergraduate school and majored in pre-seminary studies. I wasn’t a “system” guy. I had a liberal arts degree in Math.
Well, if I was going to go to the seminary and study to become a pastor, I wanted to start doing things that pastors did. What could I do? I could go out and make evangelism visits. In the context of my south Austin church, this meant following up on Sunday morning visitors to worship. The evangelism committee consisted of the vicar and his wife, a couple of young women, another guy and me. I think we got together on a Tuesday night, divided up some index cards with contact information on them, and went out to knock on doors and thank them for worshiping at our church. Hopefully, this would lead to further conversation.
My memories are a bit hazy (and you’ll learn why in just a bit), but I think we had some good visits and good conversations. I’ll be honest, I really didn’t know what I was doing. I was just willing to learn. After we attempted our visits, we reconvened at a certain time and place to debrief. On some nights we would meet at a little Mexican cantina that served Everclear margaritas.
Some of you are thinking, “What’s that?” Others are thinking, “Whoa!” Everclear is 190 proof grain alcohol. (In college, I learned that grain alcohol was an ingredient in Purple Jesus punch.) As you can imagine, throw a shot of that into a margarita and it is definitely party time. I was told, you can only have one. Halfway through my drink, I knew they were right. No one needs more than one of those. Not even on evangelism night!
Few know it, but this is one of the factors that contributed to my deciding to pursue studying for the pastoral ministry. After knocking on a few doors and taking a few sips, I thought, “You know, I think I can do this.” Of course I had no idea all that would be involved in being a pastor, but this was certainly a plus.
I never got to be a part of an evangelism team like this again. I’ve gone out on plenty of visits with plenty of other people, but we never took the time to share our experiences over a delicious and potent beverage. Since I’ve been in Florida, I’ve had some fascinating theological discussions at Tiki bars and beachside wineries, but none of them were quite like my experiences in Austin. If you were to ask me who was most influential in my decision to become a pastor, these dear friends just might be at the top of my list!
We lived on the end of the row while I was doing my vicarage (internship) in Baltimore, so we actually had a yard in-between us and the church. It wasn’t a big yard, but was fenced in so the dogs could be out there.
We also lived right across the street from an elementary school. I was told that over six hundred children lived in the nine-square blocks about the school. I don’t doubt that estimate. There were always kids coming and going, running and laughing.
And knocking at our door. You see, we had the dogs. We brought the yellow Lab, Gabriel, with us. We brought home a chocolate Lab, Rachel, a few months after we arrived in the city. They were great companions at home, on walks and when I went for runs. They were great watchdogs, too. Right after we arrived, a repairman came to the house to fix a lock. Gabriel had him pinned against the wall with a snarl I had never seen before.
And the neighborhood kids loved them. It was not unusual to hear a knock at the door and find 18-20 kids on the front step asking, “Can we play with your dogs?” We would let them out in the side yard and the dogs would chase the herd of kids to one end of the yard, and then the kids would chase the kids to the other end. The smaller children would ride the dogs around the yard like ponies. The kids would throw balls and sticks, and then try to wrestle them away from the dogs.
I’m not sure who loved it more – the kids or the dogs. Finally the kids would tire or have to go home, and the dogs would collapse, exhausted and happy, panting with their tongues rolled out on the floor.
We were there over thirty years ago, yet I can still vividly remember the sound of gunfire from a passing car, the all night conversations and music passing by our window, and those excited little voices asking, “Can we play with your dogs?”
This one happened in Florida, late one morning when the intercom from the front office told me, “There’s a man on the phone who wants to talk to the pastor.”
I knew how these conversations usually went. But I wasn’t all that busy and was feeling fairly pastoral, so I said, “OK, I’ll talk to him.”
It was a little different than what I expected. He didn’t ask anything of me other than wanting to have lunch with me. I was free for lunch, so when he told me where he was, I told him I would meet him at the barbecue restaurant just a quick walk away.
When I arrived at Woody’s, I figured that he was the guy standing by the front door, so I introduced myself, we went inside and sat down.
I told him lunch was on me. I was fairly certain a request for help would eventually come, so I was prepared to pick up the tab. When the waitress came, I ordered a lunch special, but he only got a plate of fries and some ice water. Interesting.
As we waited for our food he did most of the talking and I mostly listened. He was an experienced truck driver and was on his way to St. Augustine for his next job. He didn’t have his own truck, but was meeting someone for his next haul.
The food arrived in a few minutes, and while I enjoyed some pulled pork and sweet tea, he launched into a lengthly monologue about driving truck, his experiences and what he hoped his future would look like.
“You know all those orange and blue trailers you see on the road? Those are all beginners. That’s their first job. Trust me, they aren’t making much money. Barely enough to get by. They are just learning how to drive, so when you see them, give them lots of room.” I took his word for it, though I didn’t know if that was a fact.
I did ask, “So how long do you have to drive before you are making good money?”
He said, “At least ten years. Until then, you aren’t making anything. Most drivers don’t last that long. You have to stay clean — no record, no drugs, no alcohol. Most can’t do it. Companies can’t find drivers who are clean and most guys who want to drive can’t get jobs.”
Our conversation went on for about an hour. Mostly about truck, a little bit about family, and of course a mention of church life, since I’m a pastor and all. Then he mentioned that he just need to get up to St. Augustine to pick up the truck for the next job.
I said, “I can give you a ride.” He was meeting someone at a place near the outlet mall. Half-an-hour away, not a problem. Of course, in the back of my mind a voice tried to tell me I probably shouldn’t do this alone. But I didn’t feel threatened and he seemed honest enough, so we headed up the interstate to his destination.
On the way we talked about where he had lived in Florida, his time in the military, his kids, who were grown and living somewhere, and of course a quick mention of wanting to get back to church. In fact, when he was in the area, he would probably stop in.
When we got to the motel, he told me his truck was arriving the next day. I wasn’t going to just leave him there, so I went inside and paid for a hotel room for him.
As I drove home, I marveled at how he chose to spend a couple of hours with me rather than just asking for some help. I don’t know if he had practiced that skill, or if it just worked out that way. But it was effective. I probably would have said no to an outright request, but was willing to help as the need unfolded. Pretty clever. I’ll bet anyone could use that strategy. Invite someone into your life, gradually unfold your need, and let them be a part of your story.
I didn’t come away from that encounter feeling used. Instead, I was fascinated how our lives had intersected for just a moment in time. I learned a lot. Every time I see one of those trailers on the highway, I remember that day and what he told me about those drivers. I also think often about my vocation, and how people seek out a pastor for help. I’m safe, often generous and usually compassionate. I didn’t do any preaching or teaching that day, just bought a guy lunch and gave him a ride. Ministry moments aren’t spectacular. Neither was Jesus. Maybe that’s the point.
Photo by The Digital Marketing Collaboration on Unsplash
It doesn’t happen as much as it used to, but some who are seeking help knock at the door of the church. One family I remember in particular wasn’t in search of food or fuel, but just a campsite.
As most are, they were on the way from one place to another, and just needed a place to stay for a week while in Florida. I’m not sure why it was a week, but that was their story. They had a running car, a couple of kids, a tent, a propane stove, camping equipment, and food. They had everything they needed except for a place to pitch their tent for a few nights. But there was a campground just a few miles away, and they wondered if I could help pay for a site.
Not a problem. I drove down with them, went to the camp office and said I wanted to pay for a site for them for a week. It was pretty warm that afternoon, but it was cold, oh so cold in that office. The icy stare I got from the woman behind the desk would have made Frosty shiver. “We don’t usually do that.”
I said, “I just want to pay cash so this family can camp here for the week. I’m a pastor here in town.”
Her look softened every so slightly for just a moment, but then she held form, “We don’t like to do that.”
“I don’t understand.”
She stood up and walked from behind the counter, “It’s not that I don’t appreciate what you’re doing. It’s just that when the weeks up, we won’t be able to get them to leave. The we have to call the sheriff and I don’t want to have to deal with that.”
I just looked at her. She looked back. “But OK, I’ll do it this one time. It’s just that we don’t like to do this kind of thing.”
The campground wasn’t full or anything. No big events were coming up. But I understand. If you don’t want to have to kick them out, it’s better to not let them in. She must have had that experience before. I never thought of that.
It often isn’t as simple as we think. It usually isn’t easy helping people, no matter what anyone else might tell you. It’s rarely a “one and done.” There is sometimes another chapter to the story. Or someone has to clean up the mess later.