Posted in Life

Jazz 91.1

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I’ve got some new music to listen to while I’m working at the computer. It’s the live feed at http://www.jazz.fm, Jazz 91.1 from Toronto, Canada. All jazz music, all the time, an amazing variety of music and musicians, instrumentalists, bands, and vocalists. A few things I’ve heard before, but a lot I haven’t. As soon as I turn it on, it creates a very relaxing mood wherever I am. I even have the app on my iPhone.

It’s been a long, long time since I’ve been somewhere that had an actual jazz station to listen to. A long, long time ago, there was one in Philadelphia. There used to be a smooth jazz station in Jacksonville, FL, but they changed format to Latin music. So these sounds are very welcome when I find myself parked at the computer, working on sermons or letters or whatever.

It’s got me playing my trumpet more, too, especially some jazz etudes I’ve collected over the years. It would be nice to have some kind of band to play with, but for now, practicing on my own with some occasional background tracks has been a good way to clear my mind and stimulate some different parts of my brain.

Posted in Grace, Life, Ministry

Thanks, God

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I just listened to a message on my answering machine from someone we’ve been praying for who needed some tests done. Pretty serious stuff and a little bit of anxiety. Well, the news was good and the voice on the machine sounded suitably relieved! You’ve got to love a message like that.

Just that moment of joy and the chance to thank God for His care also made me realize that I don’t get to find out what happens to a lot of people for whom we pray. Our petitions for help and healing far outweigh our prayers of thanks and praise.

That’s one of the reasons I keep a list of prayers in the back of my daily devotional journal. That way, I can go back and remember what I prayed for a week or months ago. I would say nine times out of ten, something has happened in that situation, and I become aware of God’s response to a prayer. Without that list, I’d forget, wouldn’t think about the response, and would miss out on seeing God at work in our lives. It’s definitely a faith-building experience when your petitions are replaced by thanks and praise rather than just more petitions.

I do this when I teach prayer in confirmation class, too. We post our prayers on a bulletin board and revisit them each week to see what’s happened. I am just as amazed as the students at all the answers. Of course, not every issue is resolved. Some things remain in our ongoing prayers, but that’s OK, too. Our persistent prayers remind us of our dependence on God and his grace, and build our endurance, character, and hope.

Posted in Ministry

Shallow faith

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I think this entry is a testimony to how shallow my faith can be sometimes. Even though I’ve been getting to meet and minister to an average of one new family per week over the past months, my world was rocked by a rumor about one of our families who may be looking for another church. I don’t even know if that’s a fact, but just the idea is enough to hit my heart like a dart of failure. I know that is a totally ridiculous response, but it is what it is.

Immediately, my mind switches into guilt mode. Was it something I said? Or something I did? Was it something I didn’t say? When did I last see them? Call them? Pray for them? No wonder they’re looking somewhere else. What kind of a pastor am I?

Then I quickly change channels to defense mode. After all I’ve done for them? Hour long drives to visit them in the hospital and rehab. Coming up with money to help them get through a tough time. Support, encouragement, prayers, whatever. What more could they want? What in the world is the matter with them?

After I get all that out of my system, then faith kicks in again. It might not have anything to do with me at all. It might be a part of their faith journey. People leave other churches to come to ours; some leave to go to others. And really, there’s just one church, right? We’re not in competition with each other. They may be the blessing that another church needs. And another church may be just what they need.

I will try to call them again, just to talk with them. I would really like to know more about the next step in their journey. Recently, all I get is an answering machine.

Posted in Ministry

Unresponsive

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I didn’t get much response to my sermon today. We observed Sanctity of Human Life Sunday, and I think I got one comment after church and one emailed comment in the afternoon. Period. Why so little reaction? Could it be that I played it too safe? That I really didn’t say anything that warrants a response? It’s possible. Or could it be that the word need to incubate for a while before a response? That’s possible, too. But like most people who want instant results, I want an instant response. But the response may not come today. Or tomorrow. It may come sometime in the future. I may never see it or hear about it. This is where faith comes in. God says his word never comes back void but always accomplishes what he wants. I can only trust that God is right, that the word wasn’t preached in vain, and that somewhere, in some heart, something is happening. I should know better by now to not expect any useful response. But a part of me still hungers for that.

Posted in Ministry

Last minute sermon adjustments

Posted on by William Douthwaite

Today I’m wondering how much I should adjust my sermon to address the event that is on everyone’s mind and constantly on the news: the devastating earthquake in Haiti last week. I’m already prepared to speak about life issues this week, as we often do the third Sunday of January. Yet I can’t pretend that people aren’t thinking about the suffering in Haiti, how they can help, earthquakes, and what this all might mean. I also can’t ignore the even greater tragedy of millions and millions of abortions over the last 36 years in America.

My plan is to still speak the truth about life, and use Haiti as an example of how sensitive we are to suffering and dying in this world. So is God. That is why His Word speaks so powerfully about the value of human life, from the view of both creation and redemption. We care about life because He does. Since I don’t write out my sermons, but do a kind of storyboarding, I think I can weave this together.

Another thing to consider when adjusting a sermon is how quickly we move from one crisis to another. After five days, there are already other stories in the news, and our focus is turned elsewhere. Jesus said that earthquakes are just the beginning of the birth pangs, just a sign that the world will be coming to an end, calling people to boldly testify of him and remain faithful (Matthew 24). It’s going to happen, and you are going to need some endurance, in other words, hang on for the ride and remain faithful by loving God and loving others (Revelation). For me, that’s about all you can say about an earthquake. But there is so much more to say about life.

Posted in Ministry, Rant

Why doesn’t our church do that?

Posted on by William Douthwaite

“Why doesn’t our church do that?” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that question. Another church, near or far, does something newsworthy, and the first question is, “Why aren’t we doing that?” It’s a good question, and I’ve thought about a few responses, some better than others.

When I first hear a question like that, I’m tempted to think, “Great, something else I have to do.” That is not at all true. It is just an opportunity, and more specifically, an opportunity for the person who brought it up to get involved. We should assume that if someone notices a need for ministry, then God is moving them to get involved in that ministry. So a better response is, “That’s a great idea. What’s your plan? Who are you going to get involved?”

But as I think about it further, I believe we also need to stop thinking about competing with other churches. If a congregation is doing a ministry, then we are too, if we truly believe that the “church” is just more than our local congregation. In effect, if another church is doing it, then our church is doing it, too, and the question becomes, “How can we can join them in their efforts?” We do not need to reinvent or clone every ministry, but can enhance what God is already doing. Maybe that’s part of the message he’s sending when we wonder, “Why aren’t we doing that?”

Posted in Ministry

This thing called love

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I’m playing the part of God in an upcoming dinner theater at our church, “This thing called love.” A montage of music, video, live drama, and art, it takes us back to the days just before Hurricane Katrina, and exposes the heart of God to a world that is bent on self-destruction. I have to be the God who is upset at the condition of people, and knows what it will ultimately take to save them. It will cost the life of his son.

David is described in scripture as someone after God’s own heart. Someone who got it, who understood what God was up to, and knew he could be trusted. It’s not that David didn’t struggle from time to time. But at least he had a clue.

The heart of God is an interesting concept. His desires, his passions, his concerns, his will. All things to be sought and discovered. All part of who he is.

I wonder how people picture God. My face probably doesn’t come to mind. Although, when you’re in preschool, you are pretty sure that I’m God. I used to be Jesus when my hair wasn’t as gray. And why not? Who else would a guy you only see in God’s house be?

Posted in Ministry

Eye doc

Posted on by William Douthwaite

I got to the eye doctor a little bit early. They took me back right away for a visual field test, which is much like a video game. After that initial flurry of activity, I’ve been waiting in this little room for 30 minutes (“just a few minutes…” according to Linda). This is when you begin to wonder if everyone has gone to lunch. Or just forgotten about you. Or went on break. I hear voices, so I know they haven’t closed up. Someone’s passes by the room from time to time, but no one stops in my room. Then it gets real quiet for a long time. Creepy.

Suddenly things start to happen. The doctor arrives. Drops are administered. Charts are read. Blinding lights. Which is better: 1 or 2? And before I know it, I’m done.  And everything is fine.

Posted in Ministry

First thoughts on Life Sunday

Posted on by William Douthwaite

These are my first thoughts on my sermon for Sanctity of Life Sunday coming up this weekend. I preach on this every year in January, right around the anniversary of Roe v. Wade. And each year I realize we haven’t talked much about life issues since the last life  We haven’t heard much, either. There was some buzz that health care reform would include some public funding for abortions, but that issue has gotten buried somewhere in the massive bill being worked out in congress. There has been a little news about assisted suicide in some states. But not much.

Now to be fair, we have done a lot with other life issues, being very busy supporting food pantries, the local cold weather shelter, and helping out moms in the local pregnancy center.

Perhaps after 36 years, just about two generations, we’ve just gotten used to it. Which is a shame, because a lot of unborn children have died during that time. A lot of hungry people have died. A lot of older adults have been neglected. God’s word proclaims the truth that all human life is valuable, created by the hand of God and redeemed by the blood of our Savior. Yet, that good news often gets drowned out by political debates, economic considerations, and questions about quality of life. If the good news gets obscured, then life will be lost. So we need to speak the truth about life, speak up for those who cannot speak up for themselves, and remind each other how important life is.